LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS STUFF
I BOUGHT IT
TRIED IT ONCE
I THOUGHT IT WAS HORRIBLE
IT WAS STICKY AND CEMENTED MY LIPS TOGETHER
IT GOT ON EVERYTHING
IT DIDN’T SUPER-STAY
I THREW IT INTO MY DRAWER WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT
AND THEN OUT OF THE BLUE I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
HOPE IN MY HEART, PEACE IN MY SOUL, I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
I READ THE DIRECTIONS
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I SAW THE LIGHT
I COULD SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN WAS GONE
YOU HAVE TO PUT THE RED STUFF ON FIRST
WAIT FOR IT TO DRY
COMPLETELY (I MISSED THIS STEP BEFORE)
IT SHOULD BE SO DRY AND IF YOU KISS THE BACK OF YOUR HAND, NO MARK SHOULD SHOW
AND THEN I PUT THE BALM ON (I ORIGINALLY TRIED PUTTING THE BALM ON FIRST…. DON’T DO THAT.)
AND IT GOT RID OF ALL THE STICKINESS
AND THE RED DOESN’T EVEN GET ALL UP IN THE WHITE BALM
IT WAS A MIRACLE
THIS STUFF IS THE FUCKING BEST
IT STAYS ON FOR A REALLY LONG TIME
IT DOESN’T GET ON ANYTHING
AMAZING I WANT TO BUY THIS IN FORTY SHADES OKAY I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO TRY IT
NO BUT DO KEEP IN MIND THAT IT REALLY DOES STAY ON FOR A VERY VERY LONG TIME
AS IN, LONG ENOUGH TO FORCE YOU TO SCRUB IT OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY
THIS STUFF ISN’T FOR THE WEAK, THIS IS FOR THE POWERFUL BADASSES WHO WASH THE BLOOD OF THEIR ENEMIES OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES AT THE END OF THE DAY LIKE ITS NOTHING
I USE THIS SHIT
IT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK.
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR THREE TO FIVE MEALS.
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR DATE
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR MARTINI AND EVERY BEER YOU DRINK.
IT EVEN SURVIVES BLOW JOBS.
IT WON’T STAY ON A GLASS SO YOU CAN GO ASSASSINATE SOMEBODY AND DRINK THEIR WINE. GO CATWOMAN. JUST DO IT.
BUT THIS SHIT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK
2) your url is extremely fitting for this post thank u
i shit myself
oh fuck every time i see it i laugh so fucking hard. i have to reblog this every time. i can’t not reblog this
lOOK AT THE GUY IN THE BACKGROUND HE’S LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF
this is so great omg
He looks at his hand like it’s the first time he’s ever seen it.
this is literally mario kart
i feel sorry for the kids who didn’t grow up in the high school musical era like damn you really missed out
i donate blood in the hopes that my blood will overpower theirs and take control of their body so i will gain another vessel to use as my own
why am I reblogging this?
it appears my blood has been successful
every time i see this i laugh so hard i’m in physical pain
"There is no way two men could even begin to take care of a child"
her real parents never even realized she was fucking gone.
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